Last night I went to a very interesting talk on the lost years of Jesus by Robert Feather. I didn't buy the book he has written on the subject but, having heard him speak so knowledgeably, would suggest that it's well worth a read for those interested in such matters.
In the past I've read other books on the topic. Much of the message of Christianity seems to have been subverted by later power structures to promote their agenda. It makes me suspicious of anything regarded as the written truth. Whether Jesus even existed or not is a matter of some doubt. Recent scholarship appears to support my sense that the truth has been obscured and distorted by subsequent generations. Material power is always seductive where humans are concerned and priests are no different from anyone else in their weaknesses.
There is however no doubting the power of the message that Jesus is supposed to have delivered. Nor is it in question that the message wasn't too popular with the religious powers of his time. So what was new about the message? According to Feather not much. It all appeared to hark back to the brief 17 year reign of the extraordinary Pharaoh Akhenaton around 1300 BC. He was remarkable for being the man who swept away all the idols and gods of the previous pharaohs and initiated a pure form of monotheism. It appears that he did this with the help of some of the Jews living in exile in Egypt at the time.
He built a brand new capitol Tell-el-Amarna with a huge temple to the one and only god Aton, took all the power away from the priests and encouraged a flowering of the creative arts that was all but obliterated after his death when the priestly powers took back control. All very interesting and I suggest you read the book if you want more information.
What struck me most forcibly were the images of the Aton which were simply rays of the sun pouring down on the heads of the Pharaoh and his wife. These rays seemed to be a development of sun worship such that the physical sun took on a spiritual form. This all rings true with me.
I received no religious or spiritual guidance as a child apart from the usual Bible story stuff fed to me at school. This didn't scar me because I felt no fear or awe. The authority figure in my life, my father, made it quite clear that he didn't accept any of it so I was spared the spiritual abuse so prevalent in our society.
As a result of this lack of guidance or indoctrination I must have drawn my own conclusions and become a sun worshipper. I clearly remember as an infant, longing for the sun and watching it set over the gardens to what must have been the west. From my bedroom window I could look out over the rooftops towards the sunrise and would stare at that too. I loved looking at the sun at those times when it wasn't too bright. My mother told me it would make me go blind but I still did it until the green disc of it remained throbbing in my head when I looked away.
With hindsight this seems to me to be the root of all human sun worship. What could be more striking to a child than the sun and, as I grew up and understood more, what could be more essential to life than the sun. So there was the foundation of what was to follow.
My first experiences of inner sunlight pouring down on me weren't very striking. When they occurred in my twenties I assumed that I was having a flashback to babyhood. It appeared that I was being wheeled about in a pram with bright lights shining down on me from the top of my head. It was only in 1992 when I was at the workshop I went to with Frank Alper in Phoenix that I became aware of something much more obvious. It was as if the top of my head was throbbing and a sun shining down from the roof of my head. Each day the sensation grew more pronounced.
As I understand it now this resulted from my spending hours sitting in the group focusing on what Frank was saying and on how I was feeling. I was in a particularly relaxed state because I had no sense of having to prove or do anything. I was simply sitting there paying attention both internally and externally. Part of the reason for feeling so relaxed was that I spent a good deal of the break time being with and hugging some of the female Japanese members of the group who were extremely warm and friendly.
If I had to give the main ingredients for anyone wishing to experience inner sunshine they would be to sit and focus with a group of like minded people for hours over several days, to feel at home and relaxed, to be in search of or simply open to the truth and to be hugged on a regular basis. I did not do any meditative practice, visualising or imagining things. I just contemplated and mulled over what was said and done. In other terms, I paid attention with a warm, open heart.
What resulted was a gradual increase in awareness until there was a massive explosion of light in my head and the angelic aspect of myself appeared. All very dramatic and not something I intend to go into at length in this piece. Suffice to say that from then on the whole experience took on biblical overtones.
Put simply, it seems that when your angelic aspect turns up, for the first time in your life, you know who you really are. All doubt vanishes. You are no longer an agglomeration of memories, hopes and fears blundering through life in a dream. Who you think you are remains a part you can play in worldly life but it ceases to be of paramount importance. This sudden and total removal of all doubt reveals to you just how much you had been burdened by doubt until that moment of total conscious arrival into incarnate form. A huge sigh of relief sweeps through you in a wave of bliss. It is no wonder then that the only term that comes close to describing the sensation is the biblical one, "the peace that passeth all understanding". I cannot stress enough the ramifications of this.
Another sense is of rock solid certainty and completion. It also soon became apparent that everything I needed to know became known to me at the moment I needed to know it. It was as if all knowledge was streaming down to me from the light that filled me. Again, a biblical concept. If you add to this an ability to read minds, see into people's hearts, understand their hidden suffering and relieve it simply by seeing it, you begin to get a sense of what the state of mind entailed.
Well, I was a simple soul with no particular frame of reference or backup team to support me but you can imagine if this kind of revelation and knowledge came down to a chap who was already or about to become a pharaoh. Last night I had the sense that this was the case with Akhenaton. He was suddenly shown a new level of awareness that removed all doubt and with it the need for the idols and images that help assuage fickle or angry gods. It was a way of being that was based on the kindness and service that a fearless heart emanates so naturally; a way that called for equality between the sexes and between all people.
One of the key aspects of the angelic order is that service is the very essence of it. Angels don't boss people about. Even though they have inestimable powers, they live only to serve. They only act if invited. Given his new power and insight, it appears that Akhenaton set about dismantling the old power-driven priestly order and empowering everyone to be creative and work to the benefit of all. He did this by moving to a new city and leaving the old ways behind.
At least that's my take on it after hearing what Robert Feather had to say.
Now we come to the Essenes and the times of John the Baptist and Jesus.
It seems that when Akhenaton died and his paradise was swept away, the Hebrew exiles who remained kept the knowledge of that period alive in their secret practices. Not only that but they took them back to Palestine with them and became a separate sect that didn't go to the temple or follow the lunar calendar. They were not called Essenes in the Bible but were referred to as the scribes or the meek. They remained true to the sun and the inner light rather than the outer ritual. They studied the law but interpreted it with thoughtful insight rather than blind adherence. This was the training that John the Baptist and Jesus (if he existed) were exposed to.
Interestingly, the biblical sensations I was experiencing during my time of exposure to the light also included a strong sense that I was back in the time of Jesus even though the person uppermost in my mind wasn't Jesus but rather, John the Baptist. I felt an unmistakable affinity with him. Why this should be cannot be explained by any prior fascination with him because there was none.
The other striking similarity between my experience and that of the time of Akhenaton was that the angelic force that exploded into me was clearly akin to the sun itself. The nature of the event was of an omnipotent, blinding sun appearing in my head and causing everything to burst into flames. After several steps down in power it announced itself as Michael.
Obviously I wondered about this in subsequent years and came upon a document that stated that Michael was derived from the name Ma Ha El. This apparently means great sun god. Thus it would seem possible to me that Akhenaton had experienced the arrival of the great sun god into human consciousness. No doubt this had happened before but never to someone in a position to do so much to increase awareness of it in society at large. This, in turn, may have led to Jesus coming to be called the son of god - the similarity in the words is not, I feel, a coincidence.
So where does this get us in the grand scheme of things. I'm not a pharaoh and not about to lead a new awakening of humanity but I would like to do my bit to chivvy things along if at all possible. To this end I would like to move on to another remark by Robert Feather that made my ears prick up.
As part of the ongoing consequences of being hit in the head by a ball of light, I had a revelation at the airport in Phoenix on my journey home from the workshop. The full account of it comes up first in the list if you google "period of justification" but here I simply want to say thanks again to Robert Feather for being the first person to offer me any clue that the term justification has a meaning in biblical texts.
It's very rare for me to hear a word in my head let alone one that has no obvious meaning. When I heard the term "a period of justification" I needed more information. The ideas that then flowed into my head concerned the heart. Put quite simply, our hearts are full of emotions that block its essential function as an engine for compassion and kindness. Until we acknowledge, examine and let go of old resentments, grievances, hatreds and prejudices we are incapable feeling those noble emotions and denied entry into the kingdom of heaven. The kingdom of heaven is only open to those who are filled with kindness and compassion. According to Robert Feather the biblical concept of justification had a similar sense to it. People who behaved with kindness and followed the spirit of the law did not need to stick to the rules as laid down by the scriptures. By behaving kindly and with compassion they entered the kingdom. Having experienced it all I can say is that it is a state of mind and perception that makes every worldly pleasure seem trivial.
According to the information that flooded into me when I sought clarification on what the period of justification entailed, the human race has been since 1992 in a twenty year period of justification that requires us to let go of all the junk in our hearts in order to allow the increased frequencies of compassion to channel through us.
Given the portentous sense of biblical meaning, it appeared that this was not just a message to me but one that was meant for a wider audience. A failure to prepare for an increase in true heart energy could make life more painful as the heightened energy begins to flow in. To use another rather old fashioned term, it behoves us all to pay attention to this possibility and take steps to get our hearts in order.
It therefore seems to be important for me to use this avenue of communication to make this message available for anyone who chances upon it. If anyone requires any more information feel free to leave a comment and I'll be most happy to expand on the topic.
Needless to say, I'm most indebted to Robert Feather for enabling me to revisit the experiences described here with greater insight. I must also make it quite clear that any misinterpretation of the facts in his talk is a result of my shortcomings not his. The surest way to greater clarity is to read his book.
That's all for now but I may return to the topic again at some stage.